Setbacks happen

I started this article last week. My right elbow which had been sore from a fall, was sore again, and typing/writing hurt to do. I am right-handed. I had an x-ray and thankfully it was nothing major. I was back to wearing an ace bandage, icing it three times a day, and taking an anti-inflammatory.

So, let's try again…Setbacks may happen. This is a fact of life. You didn't get the promotion at work. Your car broke down just when you needed it. The store is out of the main ingredient you need for dinner. The question becomes how you deal with the setback. I could have been miserable, but instead, I did what was needed (and still needs to be done). My daughter helped with cooking dinner, I loaded and unloaded the dishwasher, washing machine, and dryer one-handed. I even ate with my left hand (I learned this a great way to eat slower).

There are three camps when setbacks happen. The ones who give up, the ones who start over again, and the ones who go back to the point just before the setback to try and understand what happened and continue forward. I fell into the last camp. I fell and hurt my elbow, so I needed to do what at first my fitness trainer said and then the doctor to get back on track. I am hoping that by next week I will be back to my fitness class and doing upper body weight-lifting in my workouts. Fingers crossed!

Whatever it is, setbacks are uncomfortable. Deal with it! Keeping a positive attitude will help. Some other things to do when faced with a setback…

·      Act professionally

·      Accept constructive criticism

·      Take care of yourself

·      Talk with others (— MyMNCareer)

 "Personally, I think lots of folks don't recognize difficult issues for what they are — a very convincing, seductive opponent that appeals to our human weakness to feel sorry for ourselves." — Jill Reid, Medium It is okay to at first have a pity party, but then you need to move on and push forward (see the above list of ways to handle setbacks). 

Writing this makes me think of the biggest setback I have had to date— getting divorced. Yes, I had a pity party for a while, then I got angry and then, I realized that we have a daughter, and I need for her sake to move forward, and so I did. Out of the list above, I took care of myself (and still do), spoke with others (Hello, therapy), and acted professionally in maintaining a good relationship with my ex so we could be there together for our daughter. The last item has garnered me praise as the "poster child" for a good divorce from many family members and friends. I turned the major setback into a positive by showing my daughter that even though her father and I are no longer together we are there for her and love her. This is so important for me as I have heard too many stories about kids feeling caught in the middle and I didn't want that for my daughter.

Feel free to use my story as inspiration to power through your next setback with positivity and self-care.