Peanut Butter

Lately, I have been craving peanut butter. It doesn’t matter if it’s creamy or chunky (which is what is in my house now). I am not talking about peanut butter and jelly sandwiches or peanut butter and apple slices. I am talking about eating it by the spoonful. As I kid I ate peanut butter and cream cheese by the spoonful. I love, love them both. in fact, who doesn’t love Peanut butter?! Actually my paternal grandmother. There is a story about here and a jar of Fortnum & Mason peanut butter, but I’ll get back to my blog before I digress. I asked myself this question, “Why am I craving peanut butter?” There are several possible answers:

1. My body is telling me I need more protein and that the vegetarian meals I make, since my daughter is now a vegetarian, aren’t providing enough protein for me in my north of 40 age state.

2. I am emotionally eating the peanut butter because it makes me “feel good” and I want to avoid “bad feelings".” I have Dysthymia which is chronic low-grade depression and some days are better than others.

3. I am bored and need something to do and so sabotaging my weight loss seems like something to do. Somedays I don’t feel motivated to do any work, read, or even take a walk (maybe I’ll explore this in another blog).

All of the above are answers to my question, but which one is the right answer? And yes this is a trick question. They are all right. #1 is easy to fix by adding some more protein throughout the day or adding fish to my dinner meal. #2 and #3 are related and require that I find a new or old “feel good” that would be something to do. Now I am stumped. A feel-good for me is baking, but who needs all that butter and sugar! Being creative (i.e. knitting, making jewelry, sketching in nature, etc.) in another feel good. Right now, I am not motivated (there it is again) to be creative. It is like the “creative juices” have run dry from the well. Maybe I need a new creative outlet. Any ideas?